3 Things You Don't Let the Characters of Merlin Do
by pixelsurgeon
Summary: It's rather self explanatory. Chapter one is Gwaine, chapter two is Uther.
1. Gwaine

**A/N: **So this is how this works: Each chapter is someone different. I'll have the top three things you don't let them do, and a drabble illustrating each point. Yeah. I don't own Merlin. Or LMFAO's Party Rock Anthem. (I stole the idea for using it from myself).

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><p><span>Gwaine<span>

3. Leave him in charge of the knights.

"Alright, everyone!" Gwaine called, "Arthur's gone, and he left me in charge. Which is probably a mistake. Anyways, I want you to shuffle."

"What?" Percy asked.

"Shuffle. Like Party Rock Anthem. 'Everyday I'm shuffling'? No? Wow."

"No clue." Lancelot said.

"Ah. Well, we could bother Merlin…"

"Shouting 'bother' at people is really dumb, Gwaine." Elyan said.

"Yeah, right. We could…stalk Gwen?" Gwaine proposed.

"She gets stalked enough as is." Lancelot said.

"We could train?" Elyan asked.

"Naaah, where's the fun in that?" Gwaine asked.

He was then treated to the odd sound of the knights of Camelot facepalming in sync.

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><p>2. Let him talk to Morgana.<p>

"Hey, you know, you're quite beautiful." Gwaine said from behind Morgana.

She whipped around.

"Who are you, and how did you find me?" she asked, dangerously calm.

"Well, Arthur went all 'I'll save the world now', and Merlin followed, so I'm left wandering around the forest."

"Arthur and Merlin? Where did they go?"

"I'm drunk, but I'm not that drunk, sweetheart."

She slapped him. "Don't call me that."

Gwaine put a hand to his cheek. "Oww… I'll forgive that once."

Morgana rolled her eyes.

After hours of searching, Merlin and Arthur found Gwaine and Morgana making out against a tree.

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><p>1. Don't ever, <em>ever <em>let him sit on the throne.

It was a stressful day in court. Tensions were very high, and at one point Uther found it necessary to get out of his throne.

Gwaine was all over that opportunity. He dove onto the throne when Uther wasn't paying attention.

"Oi, you lot! Listen to me!" Gwaine shouted.

Dead silence, other than Merlin laughing.

"Hey, mate, I'm serious here. First thing first, Uther?"

"Yes…" Uther said.

"Your son is currently in love with a servant girl, and his best friend is his servant."

"Gwaine, if you'd stop ruining my life now…" Arthur said.

"Nah, don't feel like it. Sorry!"

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><p><strong>AN: **Reviews are much loved.


	2. Uther

**A/N: **YOU GUYS ROCK! You're waaayy too nice, thanks for reviewing and subscribing, all that good stuff. Anyways, since he's a goldmine…

Uther

3. Tell him he neglects his son.

"It was merely a suggestion, Sire." Gaius said, "You spend so much time with Morgana…"

"She's a girl. Boys don't need all that attention." Uther said.

"Yes, actually, they do."

Morgana was sick of being doted upon. She took this opportunity.

"Yes, Uther, he desperately wants to spend time with you." she pleaded.

"He's got that brain-dead servant." Uther said dismissively.

"Merlin's not _that _bad…" Morgana said quietly.

"Sire, if you'd just _look_." Gaius said.

"Look at what? I know Morgana's pretty."

Morgana choked laughing.

"Uther, really you should look." she said.

Arthur sighed.

"I'm right here, father."

"Oh. Right."

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><p>2. Leave him to druids.<p>

Arthur watched silently.

"Alright," he said to Merlin and the knights, "I think he's there." He pointed to a tent in the center of the encampment.

"You think, mate?" Gwaine asked silently, "It's the only one that people are gathering around, and it's sure as hell the only one where we can hear someone yelling."

"You're drunk," Arthur said, "What do you know?"

Meanwhile, back with Uther.

"YOU'RE ALL UNDER ARREST FOR SORCERY!" Uther bellowed, "THE LOT OF YOU!"

Someone taped his mouth shut. And yet everyone could hear a faint 'It must be the work of magic'.

Very odd.

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><p>1. Trap him in a room with Merlin.<p>

This was Arthur's revenge for everything his father did. And also, he just wanted to annoy Merlin.

He locked them in his room together.

It was very awkward at first.

"Have you sorted out that mental affliction of yours?" Uther asked.

"Uhhh, no. I think that's staying with me." Merlin said.

"Ah. You're not dangerous, are you?"

"Nah, not most of the time. Not around you, in any case."

"Do you talk a lot?"

"Yes, typically."

"Interesting?"

"Arthur says no, but I never think he's really listening…" Merlin said. He went on.

Three hours later, Arthur found Uther throttling Merlin.

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><p><strong>AN: **I need ideas! Please tell me who I should do, and one of their things. And also, please review!


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